Thursday, November 19, 2009

I think I love WICKED more than I love my family

I just might. I started listening to the CD again and I AM IN LOVE. I wish it was like a movie where you could go back to the theater as many times as you want, or buy it and watch it all the time.

NYC in March? Work...tentative.

San Francisco anytime? I would honestly fly in for the day just to see it.

Tuesday, November 17, 2009

More DC pics and stuff

Well I had the best trip to DC. I was really able to relax and enjoy myself, at the same time I saw everything and everyone I wanted to see while I was there. Mission accomplished!

I was worried beforehand because I had this huge presentation in Dallas this morning and it was hard not to look at the vacation as just another roadblock. I kept thinking "if I can only survive until Thanksgiving..." (Hmm that sounds familiar.) But I stopped myself every time I started to think about the presentation since there was nothing I could do (or would do) until I got home.

SO. Here's the lowdown on the DC trip:

Monday - Mt. Vernon with Andrea and the boys. Thanks to her mother-in-law for the free tickets and babysitting the little one!

Tuesday - shopping in Old Town and Thai food for lunch. Then a quick trip to Potomac Mills for some great deals. I realized while in Old Town that I really need to start collecting a few things so that I can buy myself something other than clothes when I go on vacation. I mean, uh, memories? I just hate clutter! We had dinner at Andrea's parents house (thank you Louise for watching Gavin and Ryan and inviting us for dinner!), then I got a night in with the boys (we watched Return of the Jedi) while Andrea took poor little Ryan to the doctor because he had a fever.

Wednesday - Charlottesville with Aunt Elaine to visit Annaliese at UVA. We ate Indian food that was okay and took Annaliese grocery shopping (she won't have a car until Thanksgiving). Due to the pouring rain we didn't make it to Monticello, but it was fun to see my cute cuz and experience a little bit what it feels like to live in a sorority house (basically like a big B&B except dirty).

Thursday - My DC day! The rain continued but it was my lucky day because it stopped raining every time I went outside! Andrea dropped me off at Union Station where I took a little walk through time, shopping at Ann Taylor and getting my favorite chocolate chip cookie from Larry's. I spent about three hours in the National Portrait Gallery (amazing!!!) and then went to this little-known museum called Hillwood. It's actually the home of Marjorie Merriweather Post, who built it on 13 acres near Rock Creek Park to house her fabulous collections of French and Russian art. She donated it to the public upon her death in 1973 and it has been a museum since. If you are a collector I highly recommend it. Elaine and I went to Kyle and Ian's house in Arlington - they have been renovating it since this summer and it looks awesome! I got to meet Ian's fiancee Maggie and just loved her.

Friday - Wonderful Andrea...if she was sick of me by this point she didn't let me know! We went to the DC temple with all three boys and watched the Joseph Smith movie. What a fun day.

Saturday - Time to go home. Pam picked me up and we go to hang out all day until I had to be at the airport at 3:30. We went to Eastern Market on Capitol Hill, where I FINALLY got an Andrea Haffner charm (I've been wanting one for years), then back to Pam's place to catch up on each other's lives and analyze the world's problems (at least the world of the mid-single, hehe).

Movie Night! The boys wanted to be part of the Endor action!





DC Temple - Nick is quite the photographer!

Forgot my underwear

All this travel is gonna kill me. I got back from DC on Saturday night - Marie was in town so I got to hang out with her for a little while - then left for Dallas on Sunday afternoon. I was unpacking and hanging some things up in the hotel on Sunday night, and realized I totally forgot my underwear! So I went to the distribution center at the Dallas temple and explained the situation, and the ladies there laughed and said "Usually it's the GUYS that come in with that problem!" Okay, I didn't think it was that big of a deal but now I'm embarrassed.

Monday, November 9, 2009

Lost in Amish Country

And just about everywhere else we went this weekend... I think it was all the chatting - we literally went the wrong way or missed our turn off like three times!

So, we left DC on Saturday morning and headed up to Lancaster County. It was so quaint - we saw some guys in a field plowing with a team of horses, the most beautiful sunset ever, ate the best pretzels in the world, and Andrea even blinded some poor Amish man on a scooter when she turned her brights on on a country road. Unfortunately because of our poor navigation skills we didn't have a lot of daylight to take pictures, and to be honest I didn't even think about it until it had already started to get dark (I'll post our one attempt - it's not the greatest).

Sunday we spent the day in Philadelphia, where I learned the key to an authentic Philly cheese steak is the "whiz" (i.e. Cheese Whiz). You can get it with American or Provolone, but we decided to supress our gag reflex and try it with whiz. It was actually pretty awesome. We walked around the historical Old City for hours and learned more than we ever wanted to know about B.F. and life in the old Capitol city. Looking forward to Mt. Vernon today and Old Town Alexandria (and the best Thai food I've ever had) tomorrow.

WWII Memorial - both my grandfathers served, one in the Army in Europe, one in the Navy in the South Pacific Have you ever seen another picture of someone at the Lincoln Memorial with no other tourists in the background? We were so lucky! (Well, and we went at 11:30 at night in November...) Realized I hadn't taken any pictures in Amish Country as we were heading out of town to Philly. Here is my weak attempt. LOVE Park with a view of the famous Philadelphia Museum of Art "The Signor" Philadelphia Independence Hall Liberty Bell Independence Hall Tomb of the Unknown Soldier of the Revolutionary War, Washington Square

Friday, November 6, 2009

VACAAATIONNNN!!!

Don't be surprised if you get a text from me tomorrow that says "I'm in the middle of Intercourse..." Haha, Andrea and I are going to Lancaster, PA, then Philadelphia to spend the night and all day Sunday. After finishing up with the stowaway in my suitcase (my work laptop, blaaah), I think I'm finally ready to have some fun.

You know you're going to have a good time when three little boys under six throw eyeball bouncy balls at you, throw up while you're holding them, and make you pay them to sleep in their bedroom. Oh man, I love these little guys.

Thursday, November 5, 2009

Ladies, I am having an epiphany

"The world is made of two types of women: the simple girls and the Katie girls." Thank you, wise Carrie.

This was the best and worst Sex and the City episode. The one where Miranda runs away when she sees Steve on the street, and Carrie finds out Big's engaged to Natasha and makes a scene in the restaurant. The girls are sitting at a table drinking their Cosmopolitans and they start talking about Hubble and K-k-k-katie from The Way We Were. I love this episode (hey it's where I got one of my favorite insults: idiot stick figure with no soul), but I hate it because it is one of the worst things that ever happens to Carrie, at least until Big doesn't show up for their wedding in the movie.

I love the ending: Carrie sees Big on the street, getting into his car with Natasha as they are leaving their engagement party... She asks him why it wasn't her and he gives her some lame story about how it was just getting so hard, and Natasha's, well... Carrie understands,

"Your girl's lovely Hubble."
"I don't get it."
"And you never will."

Wednesday, November 4, 2009

Mother Love

When I knew I couldn't suffer another moment of pain, and tears fell on my bloody bindings, my mother spoke softly into my ear, encouraging me to go one more hour, one more day, one more week, reminding me of the rewards I would have if I carried on a little longer. In this way, she taught me how to endure - not just the physical trials of footbinding and childbearing, but the more torturous pain of the heart, mind, and soul. She was also pointing out my defects and teaching me how to use them to my benefit. In our country we call this type of mother love teng ai. My son has told me that in men's writing it is composed of two characters. The first means pain; the second means love. That is a mother's love.

Snow Flower and the Secret Fan, Lisa See

Tuesday, November 3, 2009

T-minus...

4 days: November 6, 2009 I go on my first real vacation of the year. Philly and DC, woo-hoo!

4 months: March 1, 2010 my house is going back on the market. I don't have a plan yet, just a date.


Saturday, October 31, 2009

The irony of life

Why is it that I always get a dude at the nail salon when I go in to get a pedicure and I haven't shaved my legs in a few days? I mean really!

Got this text from Cec today:
Happy happy halloweener! I love all of you stupids :)

That's my baby sis, haha. She's 20, but she's still the baby and allowed to act like it.

Wednesday, October 28, 2009

Halloween decorations contest winners!

Well I got the surprise of my life today. My team won the office Halloween decorations contest! I'm not trying to take the credit, but y'all know how I feel about decorating for the holidays - the same way I feel about crafts and cooking - so I'm proud of this little victory. I told my team we had to pick a theme and stick to it (we're not a kindergarten class, right?). We chose witches hats and hung them above the cubicles with clear fishing line. It looked like Hogwarts, it was awesome.

Our decorations were described by the judges as "truly classic understated 'Little Black' hats." Yay!

Tuesday, October 27, 2009

I caught myself thinking a funny thing today

One of the guys in my FAST group was driving me nuts yesterday. He's a 24-year-old poser who thinks he's hot stuff - man, I haven't seen an ego like his since I was on the Hill (uh, mine?). One of my co-workers from Salt Lake and I were analyzing him this morning and I said something like, "he's just like we are, he just hasn't been slapped around by life as much." Wait a second! First of all, how can I be OLD enough to make a comment like that? Second, he IS just like me, especially at that age. You have the world at your fingertips, you're on your way, you haven't experienced any disappointment (at least in your career), and you look at 31-year-old girls in your FAST group and think you will be so much further along than them when you reach that ripe old age (like, you'll probably be a millionaire executive driving a Jag, minimum).

Honestly, I have to say I'm glad I've been TKO'd enough to realize that being a millionaire executive cruising in a Jag is exactly what I DON'T want, that what I'm doing now really has nothing to do with my career, but what kind of person I want to become and how I can influence others because of it, and to be able to pat 24-year-old frat boys on the head and tell them they'll figure it all out someday...

Monday, October 26, 2009

Great friend, great example

My friend Lori, one of my Pillar House roommates, recently wrote about how much she loves her husband in her blog. I won't repeat the whole thing here, but one thing she said really stood out: "I know, without any doubt, God had His eye on both of us, coordinating our lives so that our paths crossed at the perfect time. I highly doubt that God 'crosses His fingers' when watching His children stumble through life but i know that He wants us to be happy." I love that, it gives me a lot of hope about a lot of things. Another time I will pay tribute to a few of the people who have had a great influence on me, but the Reader's Digest version is she's one of them.

Sunday, October 25, 2009

What rhymes with Dallas?

Ah-hahahahaha!

I'm going to Dallas in the morning, and can I just say...I DON'T WANNA!

I have work I need to do, stuff to pack, laundry, dishes, blah, blah, blah, and I DON'T WANNA!

I'm sitting here watching Say Anything and I DON'T WANNA! I'm forcing myself because it's one of those classic 80's movies that I've never seen (geez louise, it was written and directed by Cameron Crowe!), but I hate the 80's and this movie is boring. I know, fine, tell me I have bad taste. I'd rather be watching Wolverine On Demand, but I'm too far into the movie to change my mind. I tell you what, I'll never listen to Peter Gabriel the same.

What I really WANNA do is drink the Mountain Dew that's sitting in my fridge and read some beach trash, but if I do that I won't sleep tonight, and I'm supposed to be reading The Black Swan on my flight tomorrow, not sleeping. What I really want is to stop thinking about the future for one minute and do something I want to do not something I should be doing. Do you get it? I think I'm just trying to figure out life post-school. Don't listen to me, I'm full of sh*t.

How about those Cougs? Nevermind. How about those Angels? Nevermind. How about those Jazz?

Saturday, October 24, 2009

No me gusto

Those Cougars...unbelievable. TCU absolutely SPANKED us! Well you can't win 'em all. My poor dad, first the Dodgers, then me and my powder puff team (we lost the championship game this morning), now BYU. Lauren and I had fun anyway - it was Homecoming and we haven't gotten to go to very many games together.


Friday, October 23, 2009

A thought for the weekend...

"Creating a new theory is not like destroying an old barn and erecting a skyscraper in its place. It is rather like climbing a mountain, gaining new and wider views, discovering unexpected connections between our starting point and its rich environment. But the point from which we started out still exists and can be seen, although it appears smaller and forms a tiny part of our broad view gained by the mastery of the obstacles on our adventerous way up."

Albert Einstein

Thursday, October 22, 2009

My 7 best friends

Hilary: My sweet little sister who used to sing in an opera voice and name your future children after flowers and constellations. I'm surprised your back hasn't broken from all of us who you have carried. How do you have the energy and heart to do what you do for so many people? You don't give up on anyone. You are my person. You just get it. You were my chauffeur for years because you saved your money to buy a car while I spent mine on clothes. (Can you come over and help me with my budget? Can you come over and help me make a menu? Bagels?)

Chris: Thanks for loaning us your Tonka Truck so our Barbies could have a car to get around in (even the ones with no heads, hair, and permanent marker tattoos thanks to you - they still appreciated the ride). Thanks for playing with me and Hilary when we were little so we wouldn't turn out to be such girly girls. I don't know anyone with your strength, commitment, work ethic and compassion. You do what needs to be done without needing to be asked, and you, Dad and Bryan are the only reasons I haven't burned my house down, taken the insurance money and moved to Hawaii. You also picked the best wife in the world.

Emily: The Aquarius...humanitarian and rebel...friend to all the neighborhood pets. When you were little I'd catch you with tears in your eyes over a tender moment on a TGI Friday sitcom. When I think of those times I can forgive you for taking my makeup, jewelry, clothes, jackets, hats, scarves, finger nail clippers, my favorite TOU Marathon running shirt, and dropping my $300 air conditioning unit out of the second story window. You are my "twin sister" and my favorite former Vegan. I wish I could see you everyday forever like I get to now.

Bryan: My buddy. My back-up date to football games and concerts. As a kid you made us laugh with your OCD, orange hammer (the day you lost it was traumatic for all of us), hatred of all things fruity flavored, air guitar, mad scientist hair, Indiana Jones adventures, and you just keep getting funnier. I'm sorry you're so much like me - life can be rough for us anal retentive people. You were born a superstar - they even made a cartoon especially for your birthday! The year I got to hang out with you before your mission was priceless - it almost makes me glad you totaled your car so me and Hilary had to drive you everywhere.

Brandon: A warrior in the latter-day Army of Helaman. I thought I would die, I missed you so much while you were on your mission. But you learned how to play the ukulele so it was worth it. You make me want to be a better person, and at the same time I think it would be a miracle if I could ever be as GOOD as you are. You have no idea the blessings our family has received because of you. If you could get away with it, you would still ask Mom to make you a bowl of cereal every morning. Yes, your muscles are huge. Yes, your hair looks awesome. Yes, I love those shoes.

Cecily: Cecily Joanna, Princess Jasmine, Celly B, sweet Cec. I used walk around the house holding you and singing Debbie Gibson songs to you when you were a baby. When you got a little older, you would put your hand on the back of my hair when I'd pick you up, like you were comforting me. I needed it. I have also needed the good laugh I get every time I think of you sneaking out of the house, taking off all your clothes in the front yard, and running down the street with the dog. You make everyone feel good about themselves, and dammit you have the best wardrobe of anyone I know. I've known you forever.

Keegan: Little Keegs, cried when they killed Godzilla, wondered when you could "turn brown like Will Smith," yelled at Mom for swearing, ran around in a muscle man shirt, and made me the happiest big sister in the world when I came home from college and you had learned how to say my name correctly. You're the boss. I am wrapped around your finger. And yes, someday I will pay you for getting straight A's your Freshman year like I promised. P.S. Do whatever the hell you want with your hair! Stir it up...

Tuesday, October 20, 2009

If you hate me and want some ammo, read this

I've had kind of a rough week, if you haven't noticed. I've been feeling stressed, uptight, alright a little pissed off, and I'm taking it out on my blog. So time for a funny story. This is actually one of the stupidest and most embarrassing things I've EVER done. Deep breath...here goes.

A few years ago I was in a car accident that involved five cars - I was the second car. I got whiplash so bad I was in physical therapy and saw an orthopedic surgeon for about a year. My neck still bothers me, especially when I do something out of my regular routine. Now, if I'd had a head injury too, maybe I would understand how I could do something like this, but nope, no excuses. This was just me and a classic blond moment.

At my first doctor's appointment, the doctor and a resident (cute one) came in for a second then asked me to put a gown on so they could get a better look at my neck. I got really confused. If he's just looking at my neck why do I need a gown? Does he want me to take all my clothes off? Do I just take my shirt off? Do I take my bra off? I'm so confused! And time's running out, they're going to be back any minute. (I'm so embarrassed right now I can hardly get myself to finish writing this.)

Well - da-da-da-da! - I decided just to take it all off. That's not even the bad part. I was wearing a sweater, skirt, and tights. Under the tights I was wearing a thong. I took my sweater off and my skirt off but left the tights on. What a shock it must have been to the doctor and the resident when I stood up with my back to them, they opened the gown to look at my neck and back, and ta-da, one ass in a thong covered with brown tights (and shoes). Why oh why? It seems so obvious now! Duh! Leave the skirt on dingaling!

One thing I learned from this experience, if the doctor needs you to take more off he can just ask. Play it safe and conservative. And really, is it that hard to just verify which articles of clothing to remove as the doctor hands you the gown? Seriously!

Monday, October 19, 2009

Out

YOU ARE A PADRES AND CHARGERS FAN AND ALWAYS HAVE BEEN! JUST ADMIT IT DAD. IT'S OKAY. THEY DON'T SUCK ANYMORE!

Go Chargers! Beat the Broncos!

Sunday, October 18, 2009

Really?

I'm sitting here doing my Lean Six Sigma homework so I can take my next training course towards getting my Green Belt. It's online and it's set up in these modules where you listen to a presentation and then take a quiz at the end. I'm listening to all this mumbo jumbo - process improvement, customer value added, differentiation, control limits, project charter, just in time, blah, blah, blah - and I'm thinking, this is what I do? What's worse, I'm good at it. I should be helping starving children in Africa, teaching third world families about proper nutrition, teaching literacy classes, giving vaccinations at a refugee camp, or out building homes for Habitat... And I'm doing this? To the little girl in the green swimsuit at Bass Lake: I'm sorry I turned you into me.

Saturday, October 17, 2009

If you ain't got no money take your broke a** home

I'm talking about bringing it.

I'm just losing my patience with people (what I really mean is "guys") who are slackers. Get a job, get a girlfriend, get MARRIED for heaven's sake and move on with your life! As LDS people we know what this life is all about. Yeah joy, but also PROGRESSION. It's not about mooching off your parents (cars, place of residence, etc), watching sports all the time, driving a sweet car, going on nice vacations, sitting around with your loser friends, and "hanging out" with some girl you think is "okay" when you realize it's been a while since you've had a good throw down.

I know I'm a lot of not-so-good things (I'll even throw you a bone: some might call me a bitch), but no way I'm in neutral. Not that I have a lot of respect for this guy, but I love the Donald Trump quote "the big time isn't for slackers." In fact, I have it written down on a piece of paper at my desk. I would argue you can't even live a mediocre life if you're lazy. This has definitely not been my favorite year of my life, but I'm going to give myself at least enough credit to say I haven't gone backwards. This isn't about me anyway. I don't know what this is about actually, I'm just annoyed, and I want some things to change.

Speaking of bringing it, we had a shut out today in football, 14-0. It was awesome (no concussions this week).

Friday, October 16, 2009

LAA

The Angels need to find their freakin' identity. When I was little they were the California Angels (my first MLB game was an Angels game), then they were the Anaheim Angels, and now the LA Angels. Whaaa? Last time I checked, Angel Stadium was in Anaheim, i.e. Orange County. Why don't they just go by the OC Angels? With Laguna Beach, The OC, Real Housewives of Orange County, etc, plenty of people would get it. Anyway, as a former Los Angeleno, I don't really want to be associated with Orange County.

Whatever, I still want them to win. I hate the Yankees.

Thursday, October 15, 2009

5th Grade: Part 3

Mar. 1, 1989 Tonight was the Talent Show and Italian Dinner. Hilary and my b-friend Stephanie are in the Talent Show. Hilary is singing and Stephanie is Reading a poem. The Italian Dinner was disgusting! Hilary and her b-friend both sang Debbie Gibson songs. Hilary sang Lost in Your Eyes and Lindsay sang Out Of The Blue. I love D. Gibson. Stephanie read Sick by Shel Silverstein. She was funny. She dressed up like a sick person and cracked her voice a lot. It was a lot of fun. Today I also dumped Adam because he started acting weird. Elizabeth has to make me embarrassed by saying to him, "Don't you think Natalie would be a good model?" Of course he said yes.

Fri. March 3, 1989 This week started off pretty bad. In Math I have 5 assignments, plus my teachers loaded me with homework. My friends and I got in this huge fight with Adam and Jay. Monday, we went to pick out my glasses. They're tortiose shell glasses and they're Liz Claiborne. Tuesday I had a ton of homework. I didn't even finish it because we went to Round Table for pizza. I had to leave early for Jazz. We finished our whole dance. The Talent show was on Wednesday night. It was also the Italian Dinner. I had a Merrie Miss activity and I learned how to cross-stitch. I worked real hard on Thursday. I had to finish a lot of Math papers to finish and still have more homework tonight. I have been baby-sitting and my brothers and sisters were pretty bad. I cleaned out my whole bedroom!

Mar. 16, 1989 I have a new sister. Last night at 4:32 a.m., Mom had a baby girl, Cecily Joanna. Dad came in at about 3:30 and woke me up. I went into their bedroom by the phone and this morning when I woke up the kids Dad was in his office. When he hung up the phone he told me that Cecily was born. I was soooo excited. I stayed home from school and cleaned house. After Hilary and Chris got dropped off by Stephanie's mom, Stephanie comes barging through the house telling me about my homework. It turns out that she didn't even bring home the right books. Oh well, I can survive.

Mar. 18, 1989 Today was Chris's birthday and Allison's rollerskating party. I woke up and we had sweat rolls. Chris opened his presents and got scriptures, scripture case, 2 t-shirts and Dad said he's getting a bike. Then I got ready for Allison's party and realized that I didn't have a present so I had to give her 2 of my brand new books. We rollerskated a while and then guess who showed up, Adam and Ted. Heather and I skated with them and we talked and had a good time. Then I went home and had a great time cleaning my room.

Wednesday, October 14, 2009

High Fidelity

by Nick Hornby
Some of my favorite quotes:

What came first - the music or the misery? Did I listen to music because I was miserable? Or was I miserable because I listened to music? Do all those records turn you into a melancholy person? People worry about kids playing with guns, and teenagers watching violent videos; we are scared that some sort of culture of violence will take them over. Nobody worries about kids listening to thousands - literally thousands - of songs about broken hearts and rejection and pain and misery and loss. The unhappiest people I know, romantically speaking, are the ones who like pop music the most; and I don't know whether pop music has caused this unhappiness, but I do know that they've been listening to the sad songs longer than they've been living the unhappy lives.

Women's knickers were a terrible disappointment to me when I embarked on my cohabiting career. I never really recovered from the shock of discovering that women do what we do: they save their best pairs for the nights when they know they are going to sleep with somebody. When you live with a woman, these faded, shrunken tatty scraps suddenly appear on radiators all over the house; your lascivious schoolboy dreams of adulthood as a time when you are surrounded by exotic lingerie for ever and ever amen...those dreams crumble to dust.

It's only just beginning to occur to me that it's important to have something going on somewhere, at work or at home, otherwise you're just clinging on. If I lived in Bosnia, then not having a girlfriend wouldn't seem like the most important thing in the world, but here in Crouch End it does. You need as much ballast as possible to stop you from floating away; you need people around, things going on, otherwise life is like some film where the money ran out, and there are no sets, or locations, or supporting actors, and it's just one bloke on his own staring into the camera with nothing to do and nobody to speak to, and who'd believe in this character then? I've got to get more stuff, more clutter, more detail in here, because at the moment I'm in danger of falling off the edge.

When I saw Laura outside the shop I knew absolutely, without any question at all, that I wanted her again. But that's probably because she's the one doing the rejecting. If I can get her to concede that there is a chance we'll patch things up, that makes things easier for me: if I don't have to go around feeling hurt, and powerless, and miserable, I can cope without her. In other words, I'm unhappy because she doesn't want me; if I can convince myself that she does want me a bit, then I'll be OK again, because then I won't want her, and I can get on with looking for someone else.

It seems to me that if you place music (and books, probably, and films, and plays, and anything that makes you feel) at the center of your being, then you can't afford to sort out your love life, start to think of it as the finished product. You've go to pick at it, keep it alive and in and in turmoil, you've got to pick at it and unravel it until it all comes apart and you're compelled to start all over again. Maybe we all live life at too high a pitch, those of us who absorb emotional things all day, and as a consequence we can never feel merely content: we have to be unhappy, or ecstatically, head-over-heels happy, and those states are difficult to achieve within a stable, solid relationship.

I guess you could see it as bitterness, if you wanted to. I don't think of myself as bitter, but I have disappointed myself; I thought I was going to turn out to be worth a bit more than this, and maybe that disappointment comes out all wrong. It's not just the work; it's not just the thirty-five-and-single thing, although none of this helps. It's...oh, I don't know. Have you ever looked at a picture of yourself when you were a kid?... Over the last couple of years, the photos of me when I was a kid, the ones that I never wanted old girlfriends to see...well, they've started to give me a little pang of something - not unhappiness, exactly, but some kind of quiet, deep regret. There's one of me in a cowboy hat, pointing a gun at the camera, trying to look like a cowboy but failing, and I can hardly bring myself to look at it now.... I keep wanting to apologize to the little guy: "I'm sorry, I've let you down. I was the person who was supposed to look after you, but I blew it: I made wrong decisions at bad times, and I turned you into me."

For the first time in my life I feel like I'm in an episode of thirtysomething rather than an episode of...of...of some sitcom that hasn't been made yet about three guys who work in a record shop and talk about sandwich fillings and sax solos all day, and I love it. And I know thirtysomething is soppy and cliched and American and naff, I can see that. But when you're sitting in a one-bedroom flat in Crouch End and your business is going down the toilet and your girlfriend's gone off with the guy from the flat upstairs, a starring role in a real-life episode of thirtysomething, with all the kids and marriages and jobs and barbecues and k.d. lang CDs that this implies, seems more than one could possible ask of life.

Tuesday, October 13, 2009

Friends don't let friends...

...go through a break up alone.

1. We watch funny movies
2. We say douche bag a lot
3. We feel sorry for other people who have it worse
4. We talk about all the things we hated about him
5. We talk about all the things we loved about him
6. We cry
7. We drink soda
8. We eat pie
9. We put cold wet washcloths over our eyes (we just don't believe in cucumbers)
10. We leave work early (or don't go at all)
11. We look at pictures from the past
12. We cry
13. We talk about which body parts we like best on ourselves
14. We talk about which body parts we liked best on him
15. We talk about plastic surgery
16. We make fun of the local news
17. We do fashion shows
18. We go for a walk
19. We get pissed off
20. We stalk other girls on the internet who might have anything to do with the breakup; if we find anything we make fun of them
21. We cry
22. We take whatever OTC drug we can find to make ourselves sleep (Nyquil, Tylenol PM, ANYthing)
23. We lay in bed and wonder if we'll ever meet anyone as cute, sexy, sweet, smart, funny, charismatic, athletic, or who makes us as happy and excited as he did
24. We cry

Saturday, October 10, 2009

Some Pics...







Sack!

Last play of the game, we're on defense and ahead 18-13, the ball is just short of our goal line, coaches are screaming "hold 'em!," QB yells "hike!," overly-focused-on-scoring offense leaves wide open path, I sack her (okay pulled her flag, but her crazy shuffling caused us both to tumble to the ground giving me another pseudo concussion), GAME. OVER. WE. WIN!

If only we wouldn't have had to forfeit again...


Thursday, October 8, 2009

All That Jazz

Before I forget...and I probably won't have time to write for a couple of days... Even after all my unmotivation to do anything today, we did end up going out tonight and seeing Chicago. Omgosh I LOVED it! Surprisingly! The dancing was the best part and I loved the characters and the actors and everything about it. It was in this small, old theater called the Ambassador, which made it even that much better. Alex's friend had given her Broadway discount codes and we ended up getting close to $50 off of our 4th row Mezzanine tickets. Yay!

Our lack of sleep is catching up to us and tonight we felt like the airheads of Broadway, well, maybe not as dense as creepy pizza guy who couldn't stop staring with his lower lip hanging out. First, this couple asked us to take a picture of them outside the theater, in exchange for them taking our picture. I started posing and everyone was like "do you have a camera?" Like I thought they just wanted to take a picture of me with their own camera, I guess. I pulled my camera out, totally embarrassed, and everyone had a good time of it.

Then we got about two blocks away and Alex realized she had left her bag of Sephora products, that she bought at the Sephora on Times Square before the show, under her seat in the theater. We ran back but they had closed and locked all the doors already. We stood there for a minute wondering what to do, when this guy walked out of the stage entrance. Alex started running towards him to catch him before he walked away, but she was only like three steps away and it really startled him. She might as well have stood behind the door and yelled "BOO" right in his face. He even started to hide behind the door. He was really nice though and went and got a security guard to help us. Later I was thanking her for the backstage pass, because the security guard took us through the stage entrance, through a a maze of hallways, past hair and make up, and into the theater from "stage left." Her bag was actually still there, and the security guard gave us a quick theater history lesson as he walked us out through the main doors. Wow, I feel like I totally owe her!

Oh, and one last little thing. As we were walking to the theater, we passed these guys on the street selling "Obama Condoms." They looked at us and yelled "hey ladies who are walking fast to avoid the street sellers..." We cracked up. Can I come back again in another three months? I could get used to this.

New York

As I was walking down 5th Avenue last night, getting butterflies in my stomach more and more with every store I passed, I was thinking about how obSESSed I used with designer clothing when I was in high school (now I'm just obsessed with being trendy - I really need to get back to my roots). My senior year of high school, I was talking to my dad about perfume, I think, and only knowing what I'd seen in magazines (it's not like my friends in Heber had deep, analytical discussions about the high-end designers of the world), I pronounced Bulgari as B-v-l-gari. As soon as he stopped his hysterical laughing, he corrected me so I wouldn't embarrass myself some time when it really mattered. I still get made fun of for that one.

So one of the most awesome things I've done this week, besides the most important 12 hours I just spent last night, all night, at the store (for work), and besides eating to the point that even "just a wah-fer thin mint" could cause the Maitre D to duck for cover, is the Statue of Liberty/Ellis Island tour. Beware: if you've never done this before and are planning on it, it's at least a half-day undertaking, not just 2-3 hours like I thought it would be. And don't even think about going in the summer! I really got choked up a few times, especially walking through the museums. Rather than get on my f'n throne about some of the feelings I have regarding politics and some of the things the Statue of Liberty symbolizes, I'll just leave it at "it was an amazing experience."

Last night, after the shopping and before the store visit, my co-workers and I went to a delicious Italian restaurant near our hotel. It was no $250 meal, but it wasn't Chili's either. The best word I can think of to describe it is swanky. All the servers were wearing suits, the bussers had on the classic Mandarin-collared black shirts, and the hostesses pulled out your chair for you (even the table for one very large woman who sat near us). We were a little out of place in our jeans and tee shirts, especially compared to all the black-clad New Yorkers surrounding us. Our server was great, but overall it was hard to tell if he was sincere or laughing at us. Probably a little bit of both. When I was trying to decide what to order, he said, referring to my non-wine drinking in a restaurant that serves Northern Italian food, "With your Diet Coke I would definitely recommend starting off with the mushroom soup." I gave him a laugh and a look like "yeah I get your funny joke, but don't be fooled by the tee shirt - I don't mess around." Later he thanked me for being "adventurous." My friend kept jokingly saying "do you think they'll kick us out if..." Haha, who cares. The food was good but the restaurant can get over itself.

We still haven't decided if we're going to see a show tonight; I'm not even sure if we'll be able to get any tickets at this point. But man I'm so tired! I've been trying to sleep since I got back to the hotel at 9:30am this morning. Not an easy task during hotel-cleaning time and the daytime traffic 23 floors down. East coasters sure love their horns (one of the things I miss most about living there, seriously). I also need to work for a couple hours this afternoon, but obviously that's not happening at the moment. I'm actually kinda looking forward to coming home tomorrow...

Tuesday, October 6, 2009

The war between me and my zipper

When I get stressed out, I do stupid little things like lock my keys in the car, shave only one leg, etc. I can always handle the big stuff, but it's like my mind tells me, "one or the other Nat you choose, big or little stuff." Well of course I'm going to choose the big stuff, I mean, I don't want to lose my job, house, you get the idea. So lately I've noticed I've been leaving my zipper down. It's only happened about 2-3 times, but considering the frequency within a short span of time, it's a little alarming. So far, I've been able to catch it before I go out in public. Dude, what am I, Pee Wee Herman or something?

Monday, October 5, 2009

MNF etc.

Watched the game at a sports bar in Manchester tonight. Go... oh, I don't care about either team, I'm just enjoying a night out in a new city. Why do I only do this when I go out of town?

Stopped in New Haven/Yale today on our way.

I secretly love when I go to a restaurant that only serves Pepsi. I hate Pepsi, so it's an excuse to order Mountain Dew. Mmm...I love that stuff almost as much as Diet Coke.

It's funny when you wear something from the thrift store and within a few hours you know exactly why it was donated. I had on this Michael Stars henley on Saturday, and when I got back from the grocery store (that's twice in one week!) noticed all the buttons had come undone. Luckily I was wearing a tee shirt underneath!